Sorry

Hi everyone,

Sorry I've taken so long to write, sorry I haven't replied to your emails, and sorry to spoil your fantasies again :( I've stopped gaining weight. I'm 20 stone 6 pounds (286lbs), that's one hell of a weight, and while I'll probably still get a bit fatter I'm not activley trying to gain any more.

I started to feel ill and get rashes between my legs and saw my doctor so I'm on a healthier diet. She wants me to loose weight, obviously, but that's not really on my adgenda. If I can just stop gaining any more I'll be happy. I do still fantasise about getting huge and I've even come clean about these things with my bf and he's understanding but not keen on the 40 stone idea :P lol. He said though that as long as I'm happy and he can fit his dick in me there's no problem ;)

I asked him to force feed me a few weeks ago, I'd already eaten 2 15" pizzas (one ham and pineapple, 1 peperoni) and was full to bursting (well, I had been snacking all day lol) and he spoon fed me a tub of B&J and a whole family sized fudge cake ;) It was amazing but I've felt fuller. I'm hoping we can experiment more in the future (and if we do I'll be sure to write about it ;D)

Anyway, that's about it. Sorry about such a long break, I've been so busy! Plus I've just felt ill and lethargic (if that's the right word) and not wanted to do anything but sit around. Even my appettites gone down the last few days, but I recorded what I ate last, umm, Tuesday I think, and it turned out to be 19,429 calories (with 843 grams of fat if you like the details). I know because I've joined a weight loss, calorie tracking site (my profile's all about loosing weight and I wrote it in a bad mood so I'm not giving you the link there), and my mum is happy about me trying to control myself now as she was begining to worry that'd I'd be back up in the mid twenties lol. She thinks I've been really stupid in letting myself get so big again after such hard work loosing, but apart from how unhealthy I feel, I love my body right now. It's so big and round and when I stuff myself it seems to pull my hanging belly up a little and pushes out my upper belly ;D I look so damn sexy!

Mum is on a waiting list to get me a Wii Fit, so when I get that I'll be trying it out a little. You know how much I hate excercise but my back hurts and my legs feel weak and my doctor advised some light excersise to build muscle, as I'd gained a lot of weight so quickly my body hadn't adapted. She said if I don't build up some muscle now it'll be harder and harder to loose weight, which I can see the sense in. I'm also out of breath just walking down to my car and my chest hurts almost every day, and I get heartburn like you wouldn't beleive. But like I said, I've no real intention to loose weight, just when I'm in a bad mood in a forum surrounded by thin girls who think they're fat because they gained a pound at Christmas! Little bitches! Anyway I hope to get the Wii Fit soon because if I gain just another 3 stone I'll be too heavy for it as they have a weight limit of about 23.5 stone (so I read on the box).

Anyway I'm off. My love to all of you and please don't go away because of this because you know what I'm like ;P lol.

Ali x x x X X X x x x