Hi Everyone,
Sorry no update for ages I just haven't felt like it, and if I had I'd have nothing to tell you. I haven't done a lot, I haven't felt like going out although Sarah dragged me the other day and we both got wasted lol.
I've been eating so much, I'm probably a lot heavier. I don't want to buy more scales, someone suggested standing on 2 sets and I can see how that would work, it's actually a good idea, but if I buy more scales that's like saying to mum "hey I'm over 20 stone". She's probably heavier than 24 stone by now, I heard dad moan that he had less space in the bed. He wasn't moaning at her, he was thinking of getting a new bed :P . She only knows her weight because she has to go to the doctor quite often. The doc wants her to loose about 10 stone but he doesn't think there's anything to worry about for another 10 years or so, then she'll need new knees and probably kidneys and stuff too. I don't know I'm not a doctor, but it really puts me off my food when I think of me being that size and needing to go for check ups all the time.
Anyway I really need a way to work out my weight, there's a few places in Plymouth with those scales where you can put in 20p and weigh yourself but I can't find any that go over 20 stone. I can't believe I've gotten so big, I'm nearly twice as wide as I was last year, it feels so weird. Thursday, I went shopping, I had to squeeze onto the bus then got stuck in the seat and missed my stop!! I had to wait another couple of minutes and then cross and get a bus back to the supermarket! I was actually wedged in as I tried to stand up, my belly was stuck over the seat in front and my butt wedged onto the back rest of my seat. I've started getting used to the extra weight but sometimes I still make mistakes like that.
Then when I got to the shop I was so embarressed, I had to ask the shop assistant to help me get something. I couldn't reach into the freezer to get these pizzas I wanted, my belly's just gotten so big :( then he got it and I felt so stupid saying I actually wanted 2. And then I got him to get me this cheesecake as well. I felt so fat, especially since my clothes were all tight and my bare belly was hanging down covered in stretchmarks. But when I was shopping I looked around, because I felt a little self concious I wanted to see if people were looking at me. I realised half the girls shopping were at least 15 stone and I only saw two skinny girls and they didn't even stare at me or anything. I noticed a guy taking occasional glances at me as I filled my trolley but I don't think he was staring, I realised he might actually be like you guys, an FA (that's what you call yourselves right?). Anyway I felt a little better about it but I still feel really fat.
I've gotten over Brett, I wasn't really under him to be honest it was really just the thought that there goes another guy I like who I don't get to be with :( but anyway I'm better now :)
I'm sorry I haven't replied to your e-mails, I'll try to I just haven't felt like it and when I have felt like it I haven't had the time. Sorry, don't write again, it'll make it more confusing :P I'll reply to them next week :)
Hugs and xx's
Ali
3 comments:
That's some good describing, Ali :)
Too big to reach the frozen pizzas? That's gotta be a gorgeously huge belly you've got... any chance of you posting a (clothed, if you must) pic to your blog?
I'm glad you're feeling better after Brett, Ali. It's all in how you look at things.
Also sorry about all the trouble your newfound weight seems to be bringing you. As much of a turn-on as your descriptions are to us, your readers, you're clearly frustrated by it all. You don't like the inconveniences your size gives you; who wouldn't? Yet you ultimately bought two pizzas and a cheesecake, all of which will likely wind up in your belly.
You like eating. You like being lazy. You don't really enjoy being fat. A dilemma indeed, and one you're going to have to work through.
Would you mind terribly if I put you on my Yahoo Messenger friends list? I'd love to chat with you some time; you seem like an interesting person.
Ali baby!
There is another side of becoming too fat to fetch things for yourself in a supermarket. Being too fat to get things for yourself gives you a legitimate right to boss people around and get them do things for you! After all, you are not a little girl anymore (pun intended)!
-P
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