Big Breakfast

Hi all,

My shifts have been all over the place lately but I think I've managed to make enough time to eat well and go out drinking lol! I spoke with Amiee and it turns out I didn't kiss her, now I wish I had. I didn't actually say 'Did I kiss you?' I just brought up the subject of what happened when I'd left and nothing was mentioned so left it at that. Maybe another time, lol.

I had the biggest breakfast I've had in at least a year yesterday morning. I woke about 10 and couldn't be assed to get up so I ate from my stash. I had 2 muffins and a bar of snickers, then got up. As I did I felt my round belly roll onto my lap and it felt sooo nice. My belly's grown noticeably and I fucking love it! I ran my hands over it, gave it a loving pat then went to get my breakfast. I poured out a bowl of coco pops and ate those while I started some bacon and sausages in the pan. When I'd finished the bowl I poured myself the last of the frosted shreddies and finished them as my bacon was ready. I made that into a sandwich and then did the same with my sausages except I waited until I'd fried an egg and added that as well. I then took a tub of vanilla ice cream from the freezer and sat on the sofa eating that for a while as I watched the news. When I was about half way through the 2 litre tub (didn't quite eat all of it as I had a nibble of it with a hot apple strudel the night before, mmm) I decided to leave it.

But I was still pretty hungry and I badly wanted to stuff myself, so I mixed up some pancake mix. As the pan warmed up I took off my top and looked down at myself. I've been so much bigger but I just felt huge. And the thought of how much I was eating and how much fatter I was going to get was making me so excited I began to shake.

I got 11 pancakes out of my mix and had them with chocolate syrup, lemon and sugar and a bit of ben and jerrys chocolate fudge brownie lol ;P

I pushed my chair back from the table and looked down, now pretty stuffed and gassy. I belched and held my fat bulge in my hands, and fuck me did I feel fucking amazing! My stomach was stretched and filled to perfection. I couldn't walk any further than the sofa, where I fell back to sleep, but I wasn't in any pain. I was just perfectly full :P lol.

Today I’m starving myself through breakfast. Hard to believe I know, but I’m sooo hungry and I want to know if I can get through more if I’m even hungrier. Not that I actually have more food than that in the flat lol. I need to go shopping.

I woke up at 1, then regretted it because I was due at work by 2. I squeezed into my skirt and pulled up some tights, then pulled on my polo shirt, which is just toooo tight and my belly's starting to poke out underneath it. To cover up I pulled up my skirt but it was digging into my gut :S it's not comfortable that way but I've got no choice. I've asked for a new uniform, size 24 :S eek!

Strictly speaking size 22 would probably fit fine but, I need room to feel comfy and, while I'm not intentionally putting on weight, it's inevitable that I'll keep growing unless I make some drastic changes, which I know will take the fun and sexual thrill out of my life. No idea what my personnel manager is going to think with the upcoming uniform requests though :S

My skin is a bit, well, bumpy at the minute. Since I lost so much weight it’s been a little saggy, if you know what I mean. It’s annoying that I can’t get any new stretch marks (since I used to like seeing them) but the old ones, which had turned the same colour as the rest of me, are going red again and spreading wider. The skin on my belly feels tighter though :) It’s all a bit weird.

I’m kinda seeing the old 20 stone barrier as an accomplishment rather than a wall, and beyond that as a goal. I don’t know. I feel weird about it. I used to be terrified that I was getting too big to do things like walk far and be active, but now I really couldn’t care less. I have my phases and this will probably pass but the thought of being so fat and full that I can’t get up and need someone to feed me is just turning me on! I like the idea of having such a massive belly that it holds me down to my bed and I don’t have to go out to work. I’m set in my mind though that I’m just going to keep eating all I want, from what I know about metabolism I think I’ll reach whatever weight my diet supports and stop growing. No idea how big that would be, but I’m eating like I used to and I got to over 23 stone. To be fair I’m much more active that I was then, so I’m guessing 25 stone. At which point, I’ll die because my mum will murder me :P

Still no idea what I weigh, going home this weekend for Sunday lunch so I'll hop on the old home scales ;)

My mum’s friend owns a business just outside of town. I’m not going to say what because there aren’t a lot of them, and as I’ve said before I don’t want a stalker, but it’s to do with home improvements. Hope that doesn’t give it away lol :P Anyway, she needs a receptionist, phone sales person and my mum said since the pay’s good I should take it.

I did of course point out the big problem, it’s out of Plymouth and the buses are awkward to say the least, so she said she’d actually buy me a car! Just an old banger, £300 or so, but that since the job is a salary (much more than I make at the supermarket) that I could pay for running it myself. She said she’d buy the tax the first time and help with the insurance but I’d be able to cover it myself. I’m not as thrilled as I should be. Yeah, I want it, but I’m kinda enjoying my current job. I realise though that pretty much all the people I work with would kill for a job like this one to just fall into their lap and I feel like I’d only regret it so I’ve said I’ll meet with her for an interview.

But the thought of the car, the freedom, the ability to go down the shops or KFC at any time of the day or night . . . THAT’S something I really don’t think I could pass up! Plus I could go anywhere, the beach, the moors . . . ok that’s all I can think of but I haven’t been for ages and summers coming up!

I know, I know, I’m so fucking lucky! I’m a spoiled bitch! Like it or lump it!

I’d better go, I’m tooo hungry to think straight :S My tummy literally aches so I’m going for food. I got up at 7.30, its 8.30, so I’ve answered the question ‘how long can I last without breakfast’, and there you go, 1 hour!

Bubi for now, Ali x x x x x x x